Tag Archives: codependence

December 13th, 2016

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December 13th, 2016

My (fairly justified) separation anxiety has given me coping mechanisms that sometimes make me worry that I’m a little too good at letting go of people when I need to.

What if it isn’t that I can put up the walls when I need to, but that I just can’t connect at all?

But apparently Kara believes this line of thinking is nonsense. So I’m probably just being too hard on myself. As usual.

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November 30th, 2015

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November 30th, 2015
November 30th, 2015

I used to win arguments (or at least make them stop) by spiraling. Oh, you thought I was bad for saying this? Well, I hate myself for saying it. Oh,  you think I’m a bad husband/boyfriend/friend for doing that? Well, I think I’m an irredeemable piece of human garbage for doing it.

It wasn’t helpful. It isn’t helpful. But habits are hard things to break.

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July 5th, 2015

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July 5th, 2015
July 5th, 2015

During a day filled with reminders that my current relationships are nothing like my former relationships (including overhearing a woman  talk about emotionally abusing her boyfriend while we were at dinner), it’s hard not to engage in unhealthy behavior after having lived the life I have.

I have a tendency to put the people I care most about up on a pedestal. Right now it can be incredibly tempting to do this with my partner. But I know that will just drive a wedge between us.

So I struggle to continue to be present, honest, and engaged.

She’s worth the struggle.

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