There were days in February where I was a blank. Where my notes read things like “I worked. I can’t remember anything else.”

Since it was grief at losing my Mother that had me so disconnected, I decided to write about my memories of her on those days.

My mother and I had long conversations where we never agreed on anything, but we talked and we learned. About ourselves and each other. I have often worried (especially since she passed) that this was an unfair amount of emotional labor, but this was a role she relished and a way that we bonded.

I still worry it was too much to ask of her, but that’s for me to bear.

I miss her perspective. I miss my Mom.